AI as a Bridge, Not a Replacement: A Therapist’s Reflection on Using ChatGPT in Your Healing
It’s late at night.
Something happened earlier with your partner. Or your boss. Or your mother.
Your body still feels tight. Your thoughts keep looping.
Your therapist isn’t available.
So you open ChatGPT.
And you type something like:
“Help me understand why I’m feeling this way.”
“Am I overreacting?”
“Is this trauma or anxiety?”
“What should I say tomorrow?”
If you’ve done this, you’re not alone.
More and more people are using AI as a kind of therapist, coach, mentor, or late‑night emotional companion. Some are on waitlists. Some can’t afford therapy right now. Some are afraid to start. Some are simply overwhelmed and need somewhere — anywhere — to put what they’re carrying.
As a therapist, I don’t find this surprising.
In many ways, it makes perfect sense.
But here’s what I want to offer gently, honestly, and without shame:
AI can be a meaningful bridge in your healing.
It cannot be a replacement.
And how you use it matters more than whether you use it at all.
Why So Many People Are Turning to AI for Emotional Support
Most of the people I work with are deeply thoughtful, self‑aware, and emotionally intelligent.
They’ve done the reading. They listen to the podcasts. They know their attachment style. They can name their patterns. They often understand why they feel the way they do — and still feel stuck inside it.
What they’re usually looking for in moments of distress isn’t a diagnosis.
They’re looking for:
A place to feel safe without being seen
Validation without worrying they’re “too much”
Relief when their nervous system is activated
Language for feelings they can’t yet name
A way to feel less alone
AI offers something uniquely comforting.
It’s always available.
It doesn’t judge.
It doesn’t rush you.
It mirrors you back in calm, organized language.
For many people, it becomes a kind of emotional mirror.
A place to think.
A place to sort.
A place to steady yourself before the next wave hits.
And in that sense, I actually believe AI can be supportive.
But there’s an important distinction we need to talk about.
Insight Is Not the Same as Healing
This is one of the central ideas in my work.
Understanding yourself is important — but understanding alone does not heal you.
AI is very good at helping you make sense of things.
It can:
Offer reframes
Name patterns
Explain attachment styles
Normalize your reactions
Put beautiful language to complicated emotions
What it cannot do is the part of healing that happens in your body, in relationship, and over time.
Healing doesn’t happen because you finally “figure yourself out.”
Healing happens when:
Your nervous system slowly learns safety again
You experience being seen by another human
Old relational patterns are repaired in real time
Emotions move through you instead of being analyzed away
You learn how to stay present with discomfort instead of immediately resolving it
Many of the clients I work with are not avoiding insight.
They are avoiding contact.
With their grief.
With their anger.
With their longing.
With uncertainty.
With another nervous system.
They stay in their heads because it feels safer there.
And for high‑functioning, reflective people, that can look like healing — while quietly keeping them stuck.
When AI Supports Healing (and When It Quietly Gets in the Way)
Used intentionally, AI can be a really helpful between‑session support.
I often encourage clients to use reflective tools to:
Name emotions they’re having trouble identifying
Organize thoughts before a therapy session
Journal when something feels confusing
Draft hard conversations
Slow down spirals by putting them into words
Where it becomes tricky is when AI starts to replace the parts of healing that require:
Sitting with uncertainty
Feeling without immediately fixing
Bringing things into therapy instead of processing them alone
Learning to regulate without constant reassurance
One of the biggest risks I see clinically is reassurance‑seeking.
Especially for people with anxiety, OCD, health anxiety, or relationship anxiety.
It can start to sound like this:
“Am I a bad person?”
“Did I do the wrong thing?”
“Tell me again that I’m okay.”
When AI becomes part of that loop, the nervous system learns something subtle but powerful:
When I’m anxious, I outsource myself.
That doesn’t build resilience.
It quietly teaches your system that you can’t tolerate uncertainty on your own.
A Different Way to Think About AI: As a Bridge Back to Yourself
Here’s the frame I often share with my clients:
AI is not your therapist.
But it can be a bridge — back to yourself, and back to therapy.
Instead of asking AI to diagnose you, fix you, or reassure you…
Use it to help you become more present with what you’re feeling.
Here are a few gentle prompts I often recommend:
For emotional awareness
“Help me name what I might be feeling underneath this reaction.”
“What emotions could be present here besides anxiety or anger?”
For pattern noticing
“What feels familiar about this dynamic in my relationships?”
“What past experiences might this be touching?”
For nervous system regulation
“Offer me a short grounding exercise for when my chest feels tight.”
“Help me slow my body down before I respond.”
For preparing for therapy
“Help me summarize what happened today so I can bring it to my therapist.”
“What questions might be helpful to explore in my next session?”
These kinds of questions don’t replace therapy.
They make therapy deeper.
What AI Can Never Replace
There are parts of healing that only happen in the presence of another human.
AI cannot:
Track your patterns across years
Hold your trauma safely
Offer corrective emotional experiences
Repair attachment wounds in real time
Sit with your silence
Feel the moment your body shifts
Know when you’re protecting yourself instead of healing
And maybe most importantly:
AI cannot see the parts of you that you cannot yet see.
In therapy, healing often happens not because of what you say — but because of what unfolds between two people.
Because someone stays when you expect them to leave.
Because someone understands something before you do.
Because your nervous system slowly learns that you are not alone anymore.
My Hope for This Moment in Mental Health
I don’t believe AI is the enemy of therapy.
I actually believe it can be a doorway.
Many people who eventually sit in my office first practiced vulnerability with a screen.
They learned the language of emotions.
They realized something deeper was happening.
They discovered they wanted more than insight.
They wanted connection.
If AI helps you take a first step toward yourself — or toward therapy — I think that’s something to honor.
But if you notice yourself:
Processing everything alone
Avoiding bringing things into therapy
Constantly seeking reassurance
Feeling informed but not changed
Staying in your head instead of your body
That may be a gentle sign that you’re ready for something more.
Final Thoughts
Healing is not something you can download.
It’s something that happens slowly, relationally, imperfectly — in the presence of someone trained to walk with you through what hurts.
AI can help you think.
Therapy helps you transform.
And when used with care, AI can become a bridge that brings you closer — not farther — from the life and relationships you’re longing for.
If you’re curious about therapy, or about how to use reflective tools in a way that actually supports healing, I’d love to support you.
You don’t have to do this alone.
—
Abby Granigan, LICSW
Founder, GroundingU Therapy
Virtual & in‑person therapy in Massachusetts
