How to Make New Girlfriends in Adulthood (Plus a Free Boston Friendship Starter Guide)
Let’s name it: making friends as an adult can feel…impossible.
Schedules fill. Life gets practical. And all those soft, soul-stretching conversations that used to happen over dining hall dinners or shared first apartments? They don’t just appear in your thirties unless we go looking.
But here’s the truth I want you to hold gently today: it is absolutely not too late to find your people. Women are making soul-aligned friendships every single day, right here in Massachusetts—through apps, book clubs, social groups, walks, and bold little Facebook posts that say "Anyone else looking for connection?"
Below, you’ll find a tangible, honest guide to building your tribe in adulthood—specifically for women in Boston and beyond. These are the apps, the spots, the messages, the social scripts. But this is more than logistics. This is a reminder: you are not the only one who feels this way. And you are so worthy of being chosen—again and again.
Friendship in Adulthood: You’re Not Alone
55% of women say they have 1–4 close friends.
It takes about 50 hours to build a casual friend, and 200+ hours to build a close one.
In therapy and life, I’m hearing the same quiet ache: “Where are my people?”
What this tells us? You’re not weird for struggling with adult friendship. You’re human. And you’re in very good company.
Apps & Tools to Help You Make Friends (for real)
1. Bumble BFF (Now Bumble For Friends)
A free friend-finding app designed for platonic connection.
Use prompts to find shared values and fun intros.
Bonus: Search by neighborhood or interests (e.g., yoga, brunch, book clubs).
User Feedback: Good for casual friend dating, but finding genuine connections may take time. || “I’ve met two friends I now grab coffee with every month. We both admitted how nervous we were to reach out—but now we’re part of each other’s lives.”
🔗 https://bumble.com/bff or download Bumble For Friends
2. Livvi.app
A group-matching platform made just for women looking to build friendship circles.
You fill out a quick application and get matched into small groups via GroupMe.
A Livvi Concierge shares prompts and meetup ideas. Chats last 30 days to keep momentum.
Keep an eye on @livvi.app on IG so you don’t miss match openings!
User Feedback: Good for building a social circle. || “Honestly one of the most low-pressure ways I’ve made new friends since college.”
Local Groups & Social Circles in Boston
Girlfriends Boston
Hosts everything from creative workshops to yoga and brunch meetups.
A built-in network of women who also want to make meaningful connections.
💡 Cost varies per event.
Facebook Groups & Reddit Threads
Search on Facebook:
“Make Friends After College – Boston”
“Boston Women’s Social”
“New to Boston – 20s and 30s Women”
Message Template to Post or DM:
+ If You’re New to the city:
"Hey everyone! I just moved to Boston and I’m looking to meet some down-to-earth women to grab coffee, explore the city, or just get to know better. I love [insert 2-3 interests]. HMU if you’re open to new connections!"
+ If You’ve Been Here Awhile:
"I’ve lived in Boston for a bit but in this stage of life, I don't have many close girl friends in the area, and lately I’ve been craving more intentional friendships. If anyone’s into [insert interest—barre, bookstores, iced lattes, live music, going out etc.], I’d love to meet up or plan a little group hang!"
Reddit:
Join r/BostonSocialClub
Search “Discord” servers to meet others by neighborhood or interest (trivia, hiking, game nights)
Go-To Places to Meet People IRL (Without Feeling Weird About It)
Here’s the thing—meeting people in real life doesn’t have to be forced or awkward. In fact, some of the best friendships begin in the most ordinary places: after a barre class, over shared laughter at a bowling league, or sitting next to someone at a book club who also brought sticky notes for annotating.
In Boston, there are so many places designed for connection—you just need to know where to look. Whether you’re into movement, creativity, meaningful conversation, or casual vibes, there’s a space for you.
✨ I pulled together a free resource to help you take the guesswork out of it.
Download the free Boston Friendship Starter Map here —
a curated guide with apps, social groups, real-life event spaces, and cozy connection spots for building your adult friend circle in Boston.
You don’t need to figure it all out alone—this will help you take the first few brave steps. And that’s all it takes.
Finding Your People in Adulthood: The Soft Skills
Follow up: Don’t let connection fade after one coffee. Schedule again.
Be vulnerable: “Making new friends feels weird, but I’m so glad we met” = instant closeness.
Give it time: Like dating, friendship takes repetition and intention.
Name your needs: Looking for a brunch buddy? A deep feeler? A walk-and-talk friend? Say it.
Final Reflection: You’re Not Behind
The women you admire with their dream friend group? Many of them made that circle from scratch. From Instagram DMs. From book clubs. From reaching out even when they were scared.
So this summer, let this be your permission slip.
💌 Text the girl you met once.
💌 Post the invite.
💌 Say yes. And then say yes again.
The truth is—your people are probably looking for you too.
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When do I feel most like myself in connection—and what environments help me show up that way?
